Sunday, March 3, 2013

First Things First: Preparing Yourself Mentally.

There are a million reasons why anyone would want to get bigger, and very few of them are wrong. Maybe you want a boost of confidence that you desperately need to make friends. Maybe you want to turn your body into a project to occupy your mind from crap in your life. Maybe you want to get more attention from the ladies. Maybe you want to command more respect and admiration. All common social effects from a large build.

I’m not going to Miyagi this. You have your reasons; hopefully once you grow you don’t turn yourself into the kind of douche or bully that perpetuates the shitty image weightlifters and bodybuilders already have. Just be careful and don’t lose your mind throughout this process.

So whatever your reason, keep it in mind as motivation and that’ll make it easier for you. Now, with that thought, let me give you some quick tips you shouldn’t forget.

  1. Set a goal, but not in stone.
Both are acceptable goals. It's up to you.
Maybe you want to look like Brad Pitt in “Fight Club”. Good news! That won’t take too long. Maybe you want to look like Ronnie Coleman in 1999. Bad news! You have decades of work ahead of you. It doesn’t matter. Whichever your goal is, have it clear in your head, but don’t be afraid to change it. When I started I was sure that I just wanted to weigh around 160 lbs. When I got there, I thought I wanted 180. Now I’m at 220 and don’t have any intention to stop before reaching 250, if I can. God knows what happens then. Feel every pound you gain and decide where you want to go next. You might even get too big for your taste and want to slim back down.

  1. Keep it in the down low.
This will sound strange, but hear me out. Now that you’ve decided to grow, do your best to not be vocal about it. Don’t spam Facebook and Twitter with dramatic announcements of how you’ve decided to change and will start working out. Because of shit like “Friends”, a lot of people are under the impression that ‘friendly bullying’ is a bonding experience, and there’s always some fucking asshole that will make fun of you for it. “Oh man, I just imagined your puny ass working out and it was hilarious!”

Those coonts don't realize how crushing that is to hear, so keep it to yourself at first; your body will speak volumes later.

  1. Don’t be afraid to take compliments.
If you want to get bigger, there’s a chance you’re an insecure guy, which is nothing to be ashamed of (even the hugest motherfuckers in the world have insecurities like yours). When 10lbs from now someone you know notices your growth and compliments it, take it with a smile and a thank you. You’re not a douche for being proud of your achievement. These compliments are one of the most important things that will keep you motivated. This brings me to . . .

  1. Be proud, but not too much.
When you start to see gains, make sure you feel proud of every goddamn pound you put on because it’s a badge of your effort. It’s important to always be convinced that you’re working hard for it, and that you deserve to feel good about yourself. Remember it’s great to be proud of your work, but it’s even better to also be humble. Don’t let it get to your head. Your friends and family will be grateful.

    See? Hulking nerd. As real as Batman!
  1. Never forget what it's like to be small and weak.
If a couple of years from now you’re a lumbering giant, don’t be the kind of lumbering giant that throws his weight around. A lot of people claim—and I love this hypothesis—that ‘roid rage’ is sort of a myth, and that working out just turns you into a bigger version of what you are. If you’re a skinny asshole, you’ll become a muscular asshole, and those guys suck. Wanting respect is one thing, trying to bully it out of others is a whole other one. I really feel some people don't deserve strength.

  1. Take criticism whence it's coming.
Remember when I said that muscular guys have a bad rep? Because of some very legit reasons—*cough*jerseyshore*cough*—people are way too quick to call anyone who is in shape “a douche”. A lot of people use this as a defense mechanism: convincing themselves that anyone with arms bigger than 11 inches is “a douche” is a way for out of shape people to rationalize their own poor body shape. "Well yeah, I could be big, but then I'd be a douchebag, and I hate douchebags so I'd rather just be a twig."

You’re not building a character in Skyrim here. You’re not trading away intelligence for strength. If you’re a smart guy now, why not be a smart guy who can bench press 300 lbs? Like motherf*cking Batman.

Now, perhaps the most important one:

  1. Take it pound by pound.
It might take years and years to get the body you want. Yes, it’s discouraging to think that you won’t be huge for years, but here’s what people don’t tell you: you will feel gigantic with every pound you gain. It will take only weeks before you notice changes, and that’s all you’ll need to work for the next pound. And the next, and the next, and the next.

Don’t look forward to the moment you’ll be huge; look forward to the moment you’ll be bigger than you are now. It really isn’t very far away at all.

I think these are the first mind-and-motivation tips I can give you to start out. There will be several others posted in the “Mind Flexing” section as I write them out.

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